I’m immediately moving this pizza dough wrestler to the top of my WWE draft chart

It’s been a while since I fully invested myself in pro wrestling. Probably since I was 8 or 9 years old. But that’s because in those days, pro wrestling was packed with stars. Guys like Stone Cold, The Rock, Undertaker, Shawn Michaels, Triple H. This generation then gave way to guys like John Cena, Randy Orton and Rey Mysterio. The sport had superstars to lure you in and keep you hooked.

I wouldn’t be able to give you the name of a single new wrestler right now. WWE’s roster currently looks like what the NFL would be like if Jake Fromm was the league’s best QB. No offense to Jake Fromm or anything, but I had to make a point. Professional wrestling needs a superstar. They need a generational talent that transcends the ring and becomes one of the biggest names in all of sports. WWE needs The Pizza Man.

This is one of the finest demonstrations of showmanship I have ever seen. It’s a tragedy that he plays in a hotel conference room in front of 11 people. The Pizza Man can and should sell in major arenas around the world. And think of the endless possibilities here.

Obviously, he can hit his opponents with his traditional pie crust. But sometimes it can break up the thick crust, sometimes it can have a special kick with a deep dish. Instead of beating opponents with a metal chair, he can smash them with a giant wooden pizza peel. Toss some flour in their eyes to stun and distract them, then boom, pizza shovel on the grill. He can rub himself with pepperoni before a match to be all nice and fat and elusive in the ring. The list is lengthened increasingly.

The fact is that a star was discovered in this ring. The Pizza Man has what it takes to become one of the greatest, all he needs is a chance. And a brick oven.